What's in a Name
by AlyssaLies28
Summary: No one understood why Yusuke Kuwabara was called 'Urameshi' by some orange haired guy. They know it's not his name, so they come up with other possible explanations.


_Just a thought on how Yusuke and Kuwabara would handle the name situation if they married._

At work no one understood why a big, tall orange haired guy would occasionally run in screaming for 'Urameshi to hurry up or we'll miss the bus to Grandma's!' then end up pulling a slightly drunk Yusuke away from the bar. A bidding war was going down at the Eat Shit! Bar (surprisingly they got more costumers coming in for the name alone than for the booze and music). Most of the waitresses were wagering Orange Guy and their bartender Yusuke were brothers, adopted obviously, since they shared a grandmother. The cooks and the one lone waiter were putting their money on the two hating each other, what with the way Yusuke came into work beat all to shit most of the time.

He was such a nice man too. Always looking out for the waitresses when the drunkards got too handsy. And never once has he gotten a drink order mixed up. Sure he sometimes didn't show up for work, but everyone noticed when he did show back up he looked like he'd died and come back to life (in all actuality, Yusuke quite often died, though he managed to come back every time). This the cooks and waiter put up to their hatred theory.

Those were the small side bets going. What really got everyone throwing their paychecks into the gambling spree was the nature of the name 'Urameshi'.

The first guess anyone could come up with was that it was his surname. That turned out to be a dead end when the girls distracted the manager one afternoon while the head cook snuck into the office to read Yusuke's employment file. Everyone was sorely disappointed when his file read 'Kuwabara Yusuke' instead of 'Urameshi Yusuke'.

The next theory was that it was an odd childhood nickname. Mainly the girls believed this because it kinda went with their thoughts on the two being brothers. The cooks and waiter thought it was the code word for their fights seeing as Yusuke usually ended up tussling around in the street whenever Orange Guy showed up. What everyone knew was that they needed to find out what was really with the name 'Urameshi'. The betting pools were getting ridiculously big. Half of everyone's paycheck was going to this monstrous curiosity. Even some of the regular customers where in on the action.

After much debate, everyone agreed to send the waiter with the task of prying the truth from Yusuke on the next shift. Yusuke got along the best with the waiter. With baited breath, all the Eat Shit! workers lingered around the bar when the waiter asked Yusuke the big question, "Why does that orange haired guy call you Urameshi?"

Yusuke didn't even pause in his wiping down the counter. "'S my maiden name."

The waiter stared in surprise. Never once had Yusuke mentioned being married. He also didn't seem the type to take the last name of his wife. Armed with those thought the waiter said a confused, "What?"

"Well, it'd get kinda confusing if he started callin' me Kuwabara since that's what I've always called the sonofabitch." Yusuke explained. One of the more bold waitresses leaned in and exclaimed "You married your brother? OMG! That's kinda hot."

Yusuke stopped all movements.

"What? Fuck no!" he yelled. "Where the Hell'd you get that idea? I'll kick their asses!" He slammed his palm flat against the countertop causing all the glassware to tremble.

Waiter backed up with his hands in front of him. Waitress pooped out her hip and waged her finger at the aggravated bar tender in front of her. Maybe it was growing up dealing with very temperamental father or dating a great many men who thought they owned her that made waitress stand her ground to overbearing men. Either way she was able to turn the whole situation onto Yusuke with just a few words. "You need to stop being so secretive. Imma 'bout to win a shitload of money if it turns out you and your buttfucking brother use that name as a nickname. So get your head in the game here and set everyone straight, you incestuous perv."

The music that usually pounded in the background and made conversation hard was now at a lower volume. The whole establishment was listening for Yusuke's reply. Some were throwing in last minute bets. Yusuke snorted at waitress's prodding. Now he knew why all his coworkers were constantly giving him looks.

"First off Kuwabara's not my brother, dipshits. He's my husband." At this Yusuke held up his left hand. From this third finger flashed a think platinum wedding band that no one had ever bothered to notice. "Second, I guess it really is a nickname now, considering I legally changed my name to Kuwabara. Which Frank would know," Yusuke added with a scoff, "since I told him that when he hired me."

Various mutterings of 'Goddamnit, Frank' rang out around the room. Frank the manager wasn't fazed by the comments. He was used to his employees acting like he was purposely trying to ruin their lives. Honestly, sometimes he did mess with them a bit.

A great up roaring cheer from the waitresses mingled with the more muted groans of the cooks. Standing up on the counter, Yusuke cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled out, "And lastly! I'm the one doing the buttfucking! Not Kuwabara!"

Silence permeated the atmosphere at that extremely revealing statement. The cooks paused with the money halfway to the waitress's outstretched hands. A few beats of the awkward moment passed. Yusuke bent down and picked up a bottle of champagne, shaking it viscously.

"Eat Shit! everyone!" He yelled popping the cork off the bottle and spraying all the people closest to the bar. This of course was met with laughter and cheers from the lot. The music was cranked back up accompanied by everyone chattering at once. A round was passed around, courtesy of the waitresses.


End file.
